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To fill in the gap between blog posts, I thought I’d share this short story I wrote for Extension English. It’s a Gothic text, so it’s meant to be a little odd. Enjoy!
I frantically rustled through my wardrobe. He’ll be here soon. I picked out the lingerie he likes best, the frills brushing through my fingers, fading as fast as the hope I had that he wouldn’t come – again. As I slowly slid down the lace netting to barely cover what little dignity I had left, the lock rattled.
The door creaked open, and his big, broad silhouette came into view. Even that was enough to strike fear deep into my soul. Although I was standing right by the fireplace, its strong blaze sending warmth all throughout the room, I felt as cold as the barren trees plotted outside the mansion, suffering through the layer of snow planted on them much earlier.
In he stepped, his giant boots sending ghastly murmurs echoing through the bedroom as they collided with the floorboards below. He grunted as he planted himself in his armchair. Like a machine I knelt down at his feet and removed his boots and thick work socks.
Up he stood, and as he undid the buttons on his pants he just looked at me and said, “No squealing this time.” This routine was rough and cliché, and each time he would leave a new scar. My innocence being beaten out of me as his body’s evil desires were satisfied in acts against my will.
As he threw me onto the bed I closed my eyes and just hoped that he would be quick this time. I didn’t open them again until long after he was finished and I was sure he was asleep. I slid off the bed and put on my slippers. The less noise I made, the better. I slowly sneaked through the shadow-ridden halls.
Every time a floorboard creaked I cringed at my carelessness, and paused for what would feel like a lifetime as I waited in fear for him to awake and beat me out of blind anger. Finally, I arrived in the library. Its large, towering bookcases were the one place I could find refuge.
I browsed through the shelves where the books were the oldest of the old. One book in particular caught my eye. I pulled it out, disturbing the thick layer of dust that must have been built up over several years at least. I blew all of the dust off, although I soon regretted it.
After a violent sneezing fit I sat on the couch nearest one of the candles hanging from the wall, its light combining with that of the other candles to cast shadows in every direction. I began to read, slowly and carefully.
In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth…And God said, Let there be light; and there was light. And God saw the light and it was good…
So, this God guy created everything? Everyone? Even him… What does this mean? Confused, and intimidated by the size of The Bible, I flipped through to a random page and read, and read, and read some more.
Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you…
Deep into the night I read, and as I did, my fear disappeared. Someone loves me, someone really loves me. And they want me to be happy, and to live a good life. Maybe there’s some hope for me yet.
I sat up and reluctantly returned The Bible to its place, and travelled back to the bedroom as quietly as I had left it. I crept my way in, my heart skipping a beat as he rolled over, grunting loudly. After reassuring myself that he was still asleep, I slowly sat down on the bed with a sigh of relief.
Removing my slippers, I slid back into bed and lay there in silence. Not a sound ran through the entire mansion, in all of its vastness. But, in my mind, a million voices were all screaming at once. I finally drifted off to sleep. After many months of sleepless nights, I had quickly learnt to adapt to my fears. I slept, or I was too tired to serve him properly and would be beaten.
As morning’s light slowly shone through my window onto my face, I awoke. The other half of the bed was cold and lacked his presence yet warmth surrounded me over the absence of my nightmare. I left my bed and went to the wardrobe. I shifted through my many clothes, my many dresses. All of them, chosen just to please him.
I removed my lingerie, now ruffled and dirty, and quickly showered. If it were up to me, I would have stayed in the shower, with its hot, steamy water washing away the filth of what occurred the night before, forever. But he doesn’t like it when I shower for too long. So, still feeling worthless and dirty, I adorned one of my longer dresses, its black cloth dropping down to just above my knees. I made sure my hair was perfect, long and brunette; it curled down onto my shoulders. Just the way he likes it. I put on my make up to bring some sense of happiness to my distraught face. No matter how I tried, I couldn’t conceal my fear and sadness.
With nothing more for me to do, no more excuses for me to stay out of his presence, I put on an uncomfortable yet attractive pair of high heels and began walking. Out of the bedroom, and down the long, tall hallway. The triangular window up high in the wall at the hallway’s end sent rays of sunlight shining through, illuminating the many portraits hanging on the dark red walls. They showed all those who came before him, his lineage.
As I slowly walked down the hallway, I wished more and more that it would go on forever. I wished that I might never reach my destination, that I could just be trapped here in purgatory, forever walking.
Sadly, the hallway’s end grew nearer and nearer. I turned into the dining room, and there he was at the table. In suit and tie he sat, eating his breakfast. He looked up as I entered the room, his clean-shaven face beamed at the sight of me, and his blue eyes widened.
He stood up, “Good morning, beautiful. Come have a seat, we’re having bacon and scrambled eggs, your favourite! How’d you sleep?” he asked, as he pulled out the empty chair next to him.
Nervously, I made my way to sit down. “Good morning! I slept really well; it was great… just like this breakfast! It smells delicious!”
“That’s fantastic. Well, dig in!”
Slowly, I ate my breakfast. With every bite I was worried that I might do something wrong. I might have taken too much, or chewed too loudly.
Hours passed. Or maybe it was days. Finally, he finished eating. Placing his knife and fork on his plate, he turned to me and said, “Well that was delightful! Oh, look at the time. I’d best be off to work, I don’t want to keep the Japanese waiting!” As he stood up, he kissed me, “I’ll probably be back in around nine hours or so. Don’t have too much fun without me! I love you.”
Resisting the urge to spit out his vile saliva and scull litres of water, I managed to blurt out, “I love you too! Miss you!” back at him.
I watched through the corner of my eye as he walked outside through the large double-doors. When I heard his helicopter start up, I got out of my chair and walked to the doors. I opened them slowly, and peered out, watching as he took off.
Away he flew, beyond the rocky mountains which glistened as the morning sun shined on the thin layers of dew and snow which built up over night. A cool breeze gusted straight into my face and up my dress, but it did not bother me. In fact, it was the least of my concerns.
I spun around, shutting the doors behind me. I took the dirty plates and cutlery and quickly washed them, half my breakfast still remaining on my plate. Then, off I went.
My high heels clicked against the floor as I hurriedly walked down the hallway and into the library – my refuge. I grabbed The Bible and sat. Anxiety, excitement, I had it all. Finally, with great anticipation, I read on…
And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain…
Warmth. So much warmth. God can save me from him, God will take away all of my pain. He said so, he said all I have to do is ask for it, and believe.
Oh, the time! It’s almost dark already, I have been reading for too long. I rushed to the bookcase and returned The Bible, I’ll be reading it again soon, no doubt.
I ran out into the hallway and began lighting all of the candles. One by one I lit them, knowing all too well that with every new wick that I put against that lamp’s flame, with every new candle that caught alight, he was getting closer and closer.
Finished. The sun, slowly creeping away below the horizon, immediately set the mood. All the vast empty rooms in the mansion, filled with his worthless valuables, happily stepped back into their comfortable shoes. Their candles made all his possessions glisten with beauty, and cast long, ugly shadows in their wake.
Tik Ka Tik. Tik Ka Tik. Tik Ka Tik. The sounds of his horse, galloping up the pavement echoed all through the mansion. Until finally – they stopped. He’s here now.
Reluctantly, I went into the dining room and sat. The doors slammed open, sending with them a freezing cold breeze which rocked me to my core. In he stepped, his keys rattling on his leather belt after every violent step he took.
Closer and closer he comes: a step – another step – more. Until finally… he stood right over me – his shadow consumed me completely. My heart began pounding faster, and faster, pounding as hard as he had pounded me in the past.
“Oi wench, how was ya day?”
I felt a little calmer. Maybe tonight’s the night he does nothing. I turned around and looked at his rough, unshaved beard. I didn’t dare look at him in the eyes. Still, wavering with fear, I humoured my tormentor, “It was pretty good. I missed you, though!”
“Oh I bet ya did. I go out and work hard and rough everyday so that you can sit here in ya fancy clothes in this big fancy mansion, the least ya can do is show me some damn gratitude!” he shouted at me, over the loud, terrifying cracks of lightning, striking outside.
With that, he quickly raised his hand over his left shoulder and, before I knew it, it came crashing down, hitting me across my right cheek with such force that I was thrown onto the ground – chair and all.
As I laid there, motionless, I cradled my throbbing cheek. Even with the numbing effect of regular beatings, I could still feel the sharp sting of his hand. An eternity passed, and I just laid there, listening to his every breath.
Eventually, he walked away, and I was safe – for now. Still motionless, I prayed. I prayed for no more beatings, no more rape, no more fear, no more hurt. I prayed for safety from my tormentor, safety from this evil giant.
But then, he was back. He grabbed me by my hair and dragged me out of the dining room, and down the hallway. I counted the candles as they went past, fighting the urge to scream. But I couldn’t hold back the tears.
When we made it to the bedroom, he lifted me up and threw me violently onto the bed. And again, he walked away. There on the bed, vulnerable, beaten, I waited. My tears dropped down onto the bed, sinking into the bed sheets.
I began to think that my prayer had been answered, and that he would never return. But then he did. He came in, slowly, wavering from side to side. He crept up the end of the bed, and I could smell him. He was vile, reeking of a combination of dirt, sweat and whiskey. Repulsed, and afraid, I closed my eyes.
I waited nervously as he crawled over me. Closer and closer he came. My heart worked faster and faster, as my fear grew deeper and deeper. As he was almost right on top of me, my fear calmed and was replaced with something else – with strength, with confidence.
I opened my eyes, and I stared into his. Like a fire this feeling, this strength, built and built inside of me, fighting to get out.
I opened my mouth, and I shouted, with all of my voice, so loudly that it echoed all through the mansion and into the world outside, “Be gone! In the name of Jesus, be gone! Take your evil and be no more! Leave me!”
My alarm clock beeped, and the sounds of car engines, beeping horns and sirens, all the noise of New York City, came rushing into my ears. I awoke, and flung up in my bed, “Holy crap.”
Jason O’Neil
